It was the year 2014, when my life turned upside down. Had no clue what was wrong with me.
From 2013 I had started getting some white spots and patches on my skin, also my skin started getting darker.
Visited the dermatologist and took medicines, for time being the medicines worked the marks went off but again it was back.
Then I started getting salt and pepper pigmentation on my neck forehead. Visited doctors again, no one was able to diagnose , why it was happening.
In 2014 I was pursuing my MBA in Kolkata , was very much focused since I wanted to score well and get a good placement. My skin issues persisted finally some one advised me to visit in Calcutta Medical college in Dermatology department. I visited there and doctor told me about my rare condition, the autoimmune disease known as Scleroderma. He prescribed me medicines and said this is something which cannot be cured. I was shattered couldn’t understand what was happening, didn’t know what to do. Started searching in Google , read about it and felt worse. I started my medication for skin . But no one guided that it affects internal organs.
Time passed I continued my skin medication unaware of what is happening inside.
Focused on my studies ,2016 I completed my MBA and got campus placement in one of the well known MNC brand.
I moved to Gurgaon, skin problems still persisted went to FMRI for my skin, dermatologist suggested to see a Rheumatologist, I had number Of tests done . Results were pretty normal, no one suggested anything or explained anything in detail.
I took care of my skin took medications for that.
In 2017 , my black pepper pigmentation increased on face and chest and lips started to shrink. In month of October I found out Scleroderma India in Facebook, and started chatting with Neetu di.
She guided me to visit Rheumatologist and gave me lot of suggestions.
My rheumatologist couldn’t guide me well, said I have limited sclerosis and nothing to worry much. There was no such proper medication given.
I kept on thinking about it and got stressed.
Though my professional life was perfect, supportive family and friends but still I felt that vacuum in life.
Winters were painful with body aches , digital ulcers .
2019 November I got engaged to the love of my life , who knew everything about me and was with me in every step. In the year 2020 I got married .
In 2020 I got proper suggestion and guidance from one of the known cardiologist and he advised me to visit Dr Rohini Handa one of the experienced Rheumatologist, and Dr. Deepak Talwar Pulmonologist.
After going to Rohini Handa I could get proper medication and treatment, details about my disease of systematic sclerosis, but by then damage was already made . I had already developed arthritis after meeting pulmonologist and proper tests I was diagnosed with ILD.
I was depressed, could not accept what was going on with me could not focus.
Lot of things were going on in life. My husband kept supporting me and motivating me. There were lot of emotional breakdowns. Focusing on work and house chores were difficult. Spoke to doctors but could not get proper mental satisfaction.
But then one fine day I realised that if I don’t help myself no body will be able to. My family was with me. I became particular about my health, changed my lifestyle took care of myself took medication timely, got my doctors appointments on time took my tests on time. Changed my lifestyle. Focused on good things. Started doing things I love. Changed my focus to better stuffs.
Since then, If I compare my condition I feel much better now.
Mindset plays a very crucial role in our lives, if we have a positive mindset it is easier for us to do anything and everything. This I can say with my own experience.
If you think that you are ill and compare yourself with others then you will find life to be difficult for you.
Comparisons, other’s expectations etc make things worse. Instead we can focus on good things do what we like- may be reading, drawing painting gardening etc.
Positive mindset helps to heal. Not only mentally but physically too.
I have accepted my disease. I have a positive mindset and I have surrounded myself with positivity. “I am not a patient am I a warrior and I can achieve anything I want 😊”
I m Healthier and Happier.
To my warrior friends- Take medicines on time, continue your doctor appointments and follow everything what has been advised and keep a positive mindset.
I bet you will be healthier and happier like me.
Lots of love and positivity ❤️